We Don't Miss a Beat

Riley and his parents are in town for the holidays. We have been having a wonderful time and he has been entertaining us with his humor and his love.

What strikes me about the last couple of visits is how we just take up where we left off. There is no need for reacquainting ourselves, he just says something like, “Hi Grampy,” and we dive right into being together.

Maybe I should explain that I am a third culture kid. I did not see my grandparents for sometimes years at a time, so I had to get their measure each time we got together. There was always a slow warming up period. Even before we traveled to the Philippines one set of grandparents lived on the west coast while we lived on the east coast. It was much more expensive to travel in those days, so I would see them only every three of years or so.

Riley knows his family. The night he arrived I was honored to read him his bedtime stories. Most of the time he works me for at least two books. At story time I have developed a pattern of talking about his adventures of the day. His plane trip was longer than scheduled and very tiring, but he was surprisingly fresh. We talked about his trip on the airplanes (he loves airplanes, cars and trains). I asked, “Who met you at the airport?” He said, “Grammy and Grampy." He thought a bit and said, "Did we see Auntie?” “No,” I said, “Auntie is coming in a couple days.” Just three days before Riley and I had talked by phone and his parents had reminded him that he would see Grammy, Grampy, Auntie, Grandma and Grandpa on this trip. He was looking for his family and making a mental inventory of them.

It makes me happy that we are such friends, Riley and I. I am sure that it is kind of amazing to me because it is so different from my experience as a child. I sure do like it and will keep it that way, making sure that I spend time with his parents and him whether he is scheduled for surgery or not.

Welcome Home Dan!

Dan is home from Iraq I am told. He is the second close co-worker of mine sent for a year or more to Iraq. I doubt that there has been a day in more than a year that I have not thought and prayed about Dan being in harms way. I thought about his wife and daughter each of those days too.

Shortly after 9/11 I promised Dan that I would not march on the White House. He knew that I had protested there before. We both knew that as a soldier in the reserves, his life would change because of the attacks. I wanted him to know that I respected his choice to serve and that I supported him as a member of the military.

When the Bush administration sent our young men and women to invade Iraq for reasons they are still trying to articulate, Dan released me from my promise. They went with too few troops and not enough armored equipment into a land that had nothing to do with 9/11.

If a country must have a military, Dan is just the kind of guy you want to be a soldier. He’s smart, tough, strong and has a heart of gold. Of course, we are not supposed to know that he has that heart, but he does. If U.S. troops are going to occupy Iraq, then I want Dan and soldiers like him to represent us. In the mess of a war, perhaps they can show the Iraqi people that we are a decent caring culture that wishes them success building their nation.

For those of us against the war there is a constant tension between necessary protest and supporting men and women who have been ordered to Iraq. Democracy sometimes gets a little messy even here in the States.

I no longer work there. I will not get to welcome Dan when he returns to work the first of the year. But, I am very glad he is home safe.

Welcome home Dan!

Another Management Principle

Recently I wrote about two principles from my management guru, Harry S. Truman.

To be sure I had my quotes right I looked again at some of Truman’s wisdom. I found enough to blog for a month.

Here is another management principle from our 33rd President:

• "You can never get all the facts from just one newspaper, and unless you have all the facts, you cannot make proper judgments about what is going on."

A manager must resist the temptation to surround herself with “yes people.” It is easy to hear people toeing your line, but in any enterprise you need to look at all sides of an issue.

Getting all the facts, making sure that alternate or opposing views are heard is essential. A vital principle to remember when you are running a country, especially God forbid, if you are planning a war.

Everything that has happened on the ground in Iraq was predicted by voices that should have been heard.

By the way, if you are managing product development, you will be interested in a brilliant blog on getting facts by listening to customers. If I seem too biased, after you read it, come back and tell me.

Management Principles

Most people know that President Harry S. Truman had a sign on his desk that said:

• The buck stops here!
  

Many may not know that he is also quoted as saying:

• It is amazing what you can accomplish if you do not care who gets the credit.
  

Two principles of management. Managers sometimes forget one or both.

According to Newsweek online, President George W. Bush admires Truman.

Which one of the principles is Bush forgetting?

The Hardest Part

I wish you could meet Riley. He’s the little guy that made me Grampy in Chief two and a half years ago. He is good looking (he gets that from his parents), smart, curious and funny. He loves cars, airplanes and baseball. Baseball is in his genes, so his mother has become a fan too. If you met him you would be impressed but think that he’s just a normal kid.

On Monday we were abruptly reminded that he is not just a normal kid. Riley was born with a heart defect. He has a single ventricle and no spleen. So, even though 2005 has been hospital free and Riley has been thriving, the clock has been ticking. The two open-heart surgeries of his past lead to a third. His cardiologist scheduled the surgery. We were all taken aback because he has been doing so well. We thought we had more time. (His Mom and Dad have written about their reactions.)

On March 2, 2006 Riley will have a heart catherization. They will map his heart and the major blood vessels in preparation for surgery. The Fontan operation will be a week later, March 9.

Riley has the best care in the world. The staff at UCSF is phenomenal. His surgeon, Dr. Karl is one of the very best pediatric heart surgeons. The nursing staff in the PICU is highly trained, focused and caring. They operate on infants and children on a daily basis so they are skilled and experienced.

We want to protect our children and grandchildren. Handing Riley over to the anesthesiologists, waiting for hours during surgery, looking at the little guy with all the wires and tubes, and worrying when his temp spikes, those are the hard parts.

I have only about three months to get prepared.

The Ball That Stopped My Heart

86 years! My father was two when the Red Sox had last won the World Series.

86 years! The Sox were down 3-0 to the hated Yankees in the ALCS, the curse seemed still alive.

Wait, the Red Sox won the next four games. They won three more against a great St. Louis Cardinals team.

If you are a member of the Red Sox Nation, you were pumped during that fourth game, but there was always the curse…

Then, a soft underhand toss from Foulke to Mientkiewicz and the curse was dead!

I don’t know what the judge of Suffolk Superior Court will say about who’s ball that is. But, I do know to whom it belongs. It belongs to the Red Sox Nation and it belongs to history.